An Encounter at a Nicaraguan Cathouse

Saludos Amigos-

Last night I went out with my friends Eduardo and Carlos to a sketchy brothel called El Flotante. There are zero foreigners at El Flotante, because first of all, it is located on the outskirts of San Juan, and second of all, most foreigners would be terrified of the place. You must go with locals or you risk getting robbed in these parts of town.

Anyway, Eduardo is a good friend of mine, and a true Geminian. Very fashionable, witty, and kinda effeminate. Carlos is the local drunk. He's missing a few teeth, and every time I see him he's totally tanked. But he's an awesome guy, always smiling, and whenever I see him, he says "Borrrracho."

We walked out of San Juan into el barrio, and then we stopped at this strange white gate where there were two men and one woman standing guard at the door. They looked at us suspiciously but allowed us to enter. I walked in to what I thought was a regular bar, and a cool one at that. El Flotante is literally floating upon the local river, so you walk onto a veranda and you can look out at this murky river. It's actually quite beautiful.

At first everyone was staring at me, since I'm a gringo who obviously shouldn't be there, but since Nicas are so goddam friendly, it only took a little while for them to settle down. There were a few women sitting by themselves at a table, and mainly a bunch of men. The women were pretty fat and nasty.

One of the whores, Maria, approached Eduardo and I and sat next to us. She was charming enough, and was making casual conversation with us, but I could tell she was soliciting me for her services. She had big tits and a huge ass, but her face was wrecked. I felt bad for her, since I've been smashed in the face before and it isn't fun.

Carlos went into one of the bedrooms with some real filthy hen of a whore. We sat there talking to Maria and she pressed on and on, but finally we gave her the message and she went back to sit with the other fat dirty hens.

The mistress of the place kept going to the bedrooms, knocking, and yelling "Media hora!" to let the illicit couple know that their time had expired. I kicked back, and then I heard someone call my name.

"Dario!"

I looked back and saw El Vaquero, the Cowboy who was at my first baseball game. He had given me nasty stares at the game, so I thought he was trying to start something, but I was totally wrong. Instead, he started encouraging me about baseball, and we got to talking. I learned his name is Lionel, and he told me he suffered a horrible motorcycle accident a few years ago. He regaled me with stories of his pitching glory before the accident. I encouraged him that he could still be a manager, and I think that lifted his spirits.

Anyway, we talked for awhile, and then we left. I actually had a lot of fun at El Flotante, even though I didn't partake in the local pussy. We might go back on Friday for a big party there.

Today I had a tough practice. I started off with zero control...just throwing ball after ball. I adjusted my initial focus, however, and I started to gain control. I forced myself to throw a simulated game, which is really good for training.

Anyways, now I'm working...and betting. I've decided to post my daily baseball bets on my blog. Not to brag, but I've made about 600 dollars on MLB betting since I arrived here.

Today's picks are:

CINCINNATI REDS over Houston Astros
COLORADO ROCKIES over Chicago Cubs
NEW YORK METS over Washington Nationals.

See ya'll tomorrow.

-Darius